I have been getting more and more worried about today since I schedule the doctor’s appointment two weeks ago. My dentist found a raised freckle on the inside of my upper lip. He referred me to an oral surgeon to take a look at it. I have had freckles in my mouth before and had them biopsied. This wasn’t the first time I was having something like this done … but dang was I nervous.
I don’t think it was because I really thought the freckle was cancerous … I just didn’t want to have it cut out of my lip and to have stitches. It’s funny how I can be through so much worse, yet it’s the small things that get me all worked up. I can be totally fine about having a c-section, yet I need someone to hold my hand when they put in the IV. I can be thrown from a car, and call 911 myself, yet my palms sweat at the thought of having a freckle removed from my lip.
Funny how fear works – it’s totally irrational. It has no rhyme or reason. Yet it’s so real. It’s controlling and can be powerful. That is if you let it …
You have the capability to control your fears – you have the power to conquer them. But you must choose to do so. No one can fix that for you. It doesn’t matter how much I reassure Jaden that there aren’t any monsters in the dark – he needs to have his night-light on. He has to decide and believe that it’s not scary. I can’t do that for him. I can provide reassurance and encouragement, but in the end, he needs to control his own fears.
So as I laid in the chair today and the doctor asked me if I was ready – I had to take charge. ”Yes, I’m ready.” It didn’t hurt, my entire lip was totally numb. But I had to take some deep breaths. At times I had to close my eyes. It started to freak me out when he was putting in the stitches … so I held my hands together under the paper apron they put on me and I focused on breathing. I reminded myself that it was just my mind that was scared. Nothing hurt, nothing was wrong, it was just fear … that’s all.
And I did it! I was just fine — AND I have 5 stitches to brag about! Overcoming the fear I felt when walking into the waiting room had to be a choice. The smiling face on the receptionist wasn’t going to take it away, the numbing gel they rubbed into my lip wouldn’t numb the fear. I had to work at overcoming it.
What are you afraid of? What makes your heart race out of nerves just thinking about it? Can you change your thought process? Take control of your fear – face it and conquer it. I promise you the stitches are worth the bragging!