The time has come to say goodbye to nursing. After mastitis during the triplet’s baptism weekend and now third degree hickys (blisters) on my right side – I’m throwing in the towel!
I know you’re going to say that I gave it a good go, but I still feel guilty/bad. To be quite honest, I feel like I’m failing at my mom duty.
Seriously, God made boobs to make milk and mine aren’t doing their job well (or maybe too well ha!). I can’t get the words “real moms breast feed their babies” out of my head. What I want to know is who put them there? This is going to be a physical as well as emotional process. I just keep picturing Dori -
Lots of things are going to change with no longer pumping. For one thing, I’ll get 5-6 hours back to my day! Doug said jokingly last night “You’ll have two more hours back to the day to clean more!” Ummm really? He thinks I only spent two hours pumping? Secondly, cleaning? I’m thinking more time to play with the kids, take a shower, cook, craft, the list goes on forever! I just smiled and nodded … let him think it was only two hours - the other 3-4 hours will be my little secret. Shhhhhh
No more washing bottle/pumping parts. Man I have really grown to loath washing all those itty bitty parts and having to wash them 6 times a day! Now all the baby stuff can be put in the dishwasher. Loving that part!
The not so great part is the $ coming out of the checking account. I’m already planning regular shopping trips to Sam’s Club. AND once I get the kid’s birth certificates (LONG story as to why I still don’t have them) I’ll be able to send letters for free stuff. Let’s be honest though, formula will be cheaper than me spending a few weeks in the loony bin! To be brutally honest, medical bills SUCK! and they just keep coming. Wait, did I just turn a negative into a positive? No longer pumping = less medical bills :)
Considering I was pumping 16 oz every 4 hours, I can’t stop cold turkey. This is going to be a process. After talking with the doc, here’s my plan: wear a tight sports bra 24/7, pump only when I just can’t stand it anymore, avoid long hot shower (who has time for those anyways?), only pump for 10-15 mins to relieve pressure. I’m not sure how long it will take to be done but I’m thinking it’ll be at least a week if not two or three. Man it’ll be nice to have my body back 
Another positive!
So if I can keep focusing on the positives, maybe the emotional process will go smoother. Having my very own personal cheerleader
named Rachael also helps. I can do this!
Love, Mel
